4/3 - Tears seemed to flow endlessly as I bid each of my family good-by. I couldn't let go. I don't wanna let go. It hurts so bad. I hated myself for leaving them. Not a part of my body and soul was happy nor excited. I couldn't stop thinking of those sad faces from my siblings as they waved at me when I was already waiting in line at the security check pre-boarding area. I waved the longest wave of my life as I stare at all of them for the last time. By the time I was walking towards Gate 4 final boarding area I was a mess. It was the hardest walking away of my life. I felt so alone. I am alone. I was ready to run back and just don't leave but I reminded myself that I need to do this.
As I was scrutinizing the crowd around me, I hardly found anyone in the same position as I was -- sad, torn apart, all cried out and hurting. Many were all smiles and with their family which sadden me even more. As I sat down on my seat inside the plane, tears began flowing again. And as the plane took off, I looked outside the window for the last time and looked away. I couldn't imagine how many tears I've cried out that evening. I've never been exhausted in my life and yet I hardly slept. It was the longest travel I've ever taken even though it was only an approximate 11hrs with a technical stop of 45minutes in Guam.
2 comments:
hey moieee!!! i miss you badly! dang! i wanna cry with you i know how hard and how u felt that time. which i could comfort u. well, just think of the positive things that coul happen to u and for them in the future. in time u can adjust and be familiar with wer u are now. i know..madaling sabihin pero mhirap tlagang gawin..dont worry i know they are always there to support u. time will pass and then ull never know ull gonna be back with them once again. take care and have fun there. goodluck! gahhh..hope we could meet talaga!..miss u moieee..be back soon here. mwahugs..love yah!
yahh i knw. so far ok naman d2. its hard gettin used to living hre again. kala ko non, its jz goin to b a breeze since i partly grew up hre, but then hindi rin pla madali, esp wen im used to doin things on my own in US. now here..people do it for u. hindi na ako sanay. haii. people change nga talaga. ive changed.
ingatz ychel! yahp hope we cud meet ha! mwaahhh mizzzin u too!
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