Im sad today. Actually sad since 2days ago. My bestfriend had turn her back on me. She had completely blocked me out of her life for reasons I dont want to go over again. It hurts me so much I could barely finish my everyday chores and shit anymore. Why is this happening to me, when all I ever did was care and understand, be patient and honest. I feel sick right now. I don't like the feeling of being the bad guy, coz I was never one. And now I guess I am bad...bad enough that my bestfriend treated me like I'm a computer file, deleted from her system just like that.
One of our friends adviced me to keep my blogs from the group but I can't do it(Im sorry, but really I appreciate what you said les). Writing is the only way and the reason why I'm still here and not in some mental institution right now. Writing keeps me sane. And so I'm not keeping my blogs from anyone. All are still free to drop in and read anytime they want. This is my only gateway to sanity so please dont take my freedom of writing away from me.
A huge part of my cheerfulness just disappeared. lost. I feel so alone. God knows how much I'd like to hang myself right now. I've been crying for the past 3days and my mom even asked me when I brought her to work this afternoon, why do you look like somebody just died? I just shrugged and adjusted the volume of the music, louder and said to myself,
I'll just give her time and hope she'll come around.
I can't let go of her, not now and I never will.
I dont want her to understand everything I say, coz that's just impossible,
I just want her to know everything because she's, afterall, my bestfriend.
And so another day will sign off again, but the sad truth is, I am still alone a thousand miles away.
2 comments:
That was just two days ago, she'll get over it. I got some of my friends pissed over me before but they will talk things over once they feel they mean something to you.
By the way, I edited my post about "dumb people" where you placed a comment, come to think of it, it was really harsh. I might get killed for such a comment! hahaha
hehe tnx i know and i hope she'll get over it.
n yeah bout that dumb people thingy...there is really some truth bout what u said,hey that's why we write! so nah...you'll live hehe.
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